October 2, 2010

Now dare you forget the concepts!

How to differentiate between Marketing, PR, Advertising and the like. All people around me say they're essentially the same with a little twist in their tales. Well, here's a tale...for all you 'adult' marketers!

You’re a man and you see a gorgeous woman at a party. You go up to her and say, “I’m fantastic in bed.” That’s Direct Marketing. Pretty much like Dell.
You’re at a party with a bunch of friends and see a gorgeous woman. One of your friends goes up to her and pointing at you says, “He’s fantastic in bed.” That’s Advertising. The Priyagold way, esp. when you know no one's going to buy your product.
You see a gorgeous woman at a party. You go up to her and get her telephone number. The next day you call and say, “Hi, I’m fantastic in bed.” That’s Telemarketing. Hmmm, yes like ICICI!
You’re at a party and see a gorgeous woman. You get up and straighten your tie. You walk up to her and pour her a drink and then say, “By the way, I’m also fantastic in bed.” That’s Public Relations. Remember Vijay Mallya and Kingfisher?
You’re at a party and see a gorgeous woman. She walks up to you and says, “I hear you’re fantastic in bed.” That’s Brand Recognition. Like the Apple logo.
You're at a party and see a gorgeous woman. You remember she is the same from last night but this time she walks upto your brother  and whispers in his ear, "I guess you're great in bed like your brother." That's Brand Equity. Yes, the Unilever way.
You’re at a party and see a gorgeous woman. You talk her into going home with your friend. That’s a Sales Representative. Has to be someone from the private insurance department.
You're at a party and see a gorgeous woman. You walk upto her and talk her into taking both you and your friend to her place. That's Sales promotion. Bundling like FMCG soaps. 
Your friend can’t satisfy her so he calls you. That’s Tech Support. From Microsoft.
You're at a party and see a gorgeous woman. You walk upto her, hand over your visiting card and shout loudly, so all can hear, "Isse sasta aur achcha kahin nahin." That's 'Shameless' promotion. Do I need to say like whom?
You’re on your way to a party when you realise that there could be gorgeous women in all these houses you’re passing. So you climb onto the roof of one situated toward the center and shout at the top of your lungs, “I’m fantastic in bed!” That’s Junk Mail. Yeah, the Chinese penis enlargement pills!

Now go spread the knowledge!
 
With hugs and kisses to the Consumer, 
The Young Marketer.

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